Maxwell Sellers’ Yearbook Message to Maxwell Sellers
January 31, 2008
“I wish I had more friends.”
Sara Hornby’s Yearbook Message to Steve Grimm
January 30, 2008
“Hey. I wish you didn’t stare at my rack for four years straight. I know you think you are passing it off as watching me sign your yearbook now, but I am aware that it is just a thinly disguised way to stare at my tits.”
Josh Kaufman’s Yearbook Message to Maggie Ranges
January 29, 2008
“Hey, I didn’t know you that well, but I hope you have fun at college. Maybe you’re acne will clear up and some guy will fuck you. I mean, afterwards he will tell all his friends what a whore you are, but at least you’ll get laid, right! Yeah, you know.”
Jon Petrilak’s Yearbook Message to Susan Thorne
January 28, 2008
“I had my first homosexual experience last night. Don’t tell anyone.”
Mark Jacobsen’s Yearbook Message to Josh Lennon
January 24, 2008
“I’m only in it for the pussy.”
Mary Jane Anderson’s Yearbook Message to Julie Foer
January 22, 2008
“You’re the best friend I could have asked for, and I would like to thank you for that. That’s the first thing I want to say. We spent all four years of high school together, and I want you to think of me every single day you are off at college without me. I know we were supposed to go together. I am sorry things didn’t work out.
I’ll love you. Forever. Forever and ever. Best friends for life!
I remember that time when we were 6 and we tried to get to the moon by using or pogo sticks on your cousin’s trampoline. Then the trampoline broke and we both sprained our ankles. I thought we were going to die! Or that your uncle was going to kill us. That was so much fun! To bad it didn’t.
We used to be so happy then. To be honest, I haven’t been happy since. Everyday I wake up and wonder why the fuck I decided to do that. They say live day by day, but I haven’t had a good day and years, so what is the point. I miss being happy. I miss being okay. I miss being sad. I am miserable. Depressed. Far below “sad.” I want to die.
That’s why I am going to kill myself. You’ll never have to worry about me or my bullshit problems ever again. Go fuck your little faggot now.
PS – Have an awesome summer!”
Laughing Babies 6
January 21, 2008
New Code Name
January 21, 2008
From now on call me “Jet Dawg.”
Rapist, not Raper
January 19, 2008
Today I overheard somebody talking to his date in the booth behind me at Arby’s. He was telling her that he hates it when people say her is a raper. Apparently, the politically correct term is “rapist.” Those who rape feel that the word “raper” implies that there is also a “rapee.” To them that just implies far too much that there are victims to their actions. “Rapist” makes them sound like a state of being. Such as, “Hi. My name is Eric and I am a rapist.” Just your small town boy, and he just happens to rape people. That’s just how he is. Live and let live, is how they want you to see it. I don’t know about you, but I say political correctness is stupid. I mean, just the other day some black guy called me a cracker, and I couldn’t say anything!
Would You Rather 2
January 18, 2008
Be bored and ask yourself a stupid question.
